I recently revealed that I had Breast Augmentation surgery, no biggie that’s not what this post about. I premiered the video on my Youtube on Friday night with a Live Chat to interact with people watching the video. I had mentioned in the video that I paid for my surgery myself with my money, not my husband’s. Somebody commented saying “If you’re married his money is your money, and your money is his”. I responded by saying sweetie my marriage is not one of those.
So let’s talk, my head came out of the clouds years before I got married. Thank God for that. I don’t have time for fairytales, I know from past experience my heart can’t be trusted. I also want to add, my thoughts and suggestions are always based on my own personal experience and what works and has worked for me. It does not mean it will work for everybody. I think anyone going into marriage thinking, mine is yours and yours is mine especially when we are talking about one of the biggest sins – MONEY is living in La La Land. This blog is aimed at women, PLEAS DON’T BE SILLY. The fairytale only exist in Disney movies. People change, people grow apart and shit happens. You want to make sure you have your own back first.
Nobody plans going into a marriage to get a divorce, we all imagine forever. Men with a reasonable amount of wealth will most likely think about what can go wrong, which is why traditionally it has always been men suggesting that women sign prenups. We all saw what happened to Adelle when she divorced her husband, he walked away with more money than she was worth. Feelings and butterflies are nice, riding off into the sunset on a white horse is nice. But sometimes you have to realistic, I love my husband but I’m not stupid. We have separate accounts and I don’t feel like it’s necessary for any of us to police how much the other person is making. Our bills are always paid on time, we both have amazing credit scores and we aren’t in debt and as far as I’m concerned that’s all I care about. When I need to start policing is when any of that changes. We are both grown people.
Of course marriage is about team work, but put your oxygen mask on first and then help your loved ones. See I pay attention when the flight attendants do their safety briefings, lol. A couple years ago I got myself into a very compromising situation with a boyfriend. I thought after all these years and everything I had done for him, including creating enemies and working 16 hour days, that he would at least have my back on a business level. He put his business, money and friends first. No degree program could have taught me what that experience did.
I have no problem helping my husband because we are a team, but his money is his money and my money is mine. I prefer it like that, it’s easier to manage in my opinion. I’m grinding for myself, so we can have a great life together and he’s doing the same. When this marriage ends, I don’t expect to leave with anything I didn’t come in with. We aren’t talking about if we started a business together or if I catch his ass cheating 🙃🙃.
This blog is just a long ass way of me saying, the older I get the more important it got for me to have my own money. I love to earn it and I love to spend it but most importantly, I love that NOBODY can tell me what to do with it. Don’t ever think because you are riding for someone that they are riding for you the same way. We all ride different and that’s facts.
What are your thoughts on this sound off below.
PS – This does not rule out taking money from a man, TAKE THAT SHIT SIS