San Jose, California

If I could Write My Own Legacy

July 30, 2018

So Im currently reading this amazing book, which if you follow me on Instagram you should know what book  it is, check under my books tab.  One of the questions the book asks is if you were to die what would you want them to say about you? What kind of person do you want to be remembered as?

I would like to be known as a woman who kept her word and never sacrificed who I was for society’s approval.  I want to be remembered as someone who did what she said she would, and was not afraid to be sexy and educated. Not one or the other, the way we were raised to believe.  I’m hoping that young girls and women can look to me and realize you DO NOT, have to bend yourself, your dreams and your life for the approval or the acceptance of a man.  I am hoping they will see that you do not need a man to be considered an accomplished woman, neither does a man need a model type chic to be considered successful. You can be yourself, unapologetic and raw, whoever you are it’s ok to be that person.  Society tells young girls we MUSt be a certain way or no man will marry us, it shames older women who do not have children.  A woman could extremely successful you’re bound to hear a comment like this “Why doesn’t she have a child by now. She needs to settle down and have a kid she’s in her 30’s why isn’t she married”.  Yet no one will say anything about the 40 year old man who has a new girlfriend every two years, no kids and still goes clubbing every weekend, he is hailed as a king.

For years I was ridiculed and bashed because I refused to do the things that girls should do to please men.  I refused to cook and I was bashed for it. You’re too loud, too opinionated and to be honest too impressed by your own self, no man wants a woman like that.  The stress they placed on finding a mate was so annoying, like every girls goal in life to find a man and have a child and post baby videos on Instagram (nothing is wrong with that, let’s be clear). It’s almost absurd; a woman not obsessed with pleasing a man or being in a relationship, apparently that’s all society thinks women are capable of we can only play the role of the doting wife or the giddy girlfriend.  That’s a cycle I want my existence to break, this relationship codependent culture. of course this sounds weird coming from a married woman who just celebrated her five year anniversary, but that’s exactly why I’m the perfect person to tell you this.  The right person will walk into your life and you won’t need to chase them or go out of your way to put on a show to get their attention.

Society has shamed us for too long and we have the power to change it by honestly not giving a fuck anymore.  A woman gets work done to her body to meet societies standards and after making her feel ugly for her current body when she changes it she is shamed for not being happy with the body she was born with.  I honestly could go on and on, don’t let anyone take you for granted, don’t allow anyone to make you feel bad for what is it YOU WANT.  You don’t have to stick around hoping someone will change their mind about you, you can go and find exactly what it is you want.

Have an amazing week love bunnies, go be your own authentic self. Be inspired

xoxo Lauren

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